The Day My Water Broke

Today one of my dearest mommy friends gave birth to her baby boy. It’s been a great day and I’m so happy for her. It has brought up so many memories of the day that I gave birth to Gus. One of the blogs I read today asked readers to recall their best memory about giving birth. Mine might surprise you a bit.

Yes, the greatest moment of the day was when I finally delivered Gus and was able to hold him in my arms for the first time. Best moment of my life. But you probably aren’t interested in hearing that story. It’s beautiful and sweet, but it’s already been told a gazillion times. So, I decided to pick the second best memory.

You might even learn something from this.

So, I was in what we all know as the pushing stage. Knees up, chin down, and a head between your legs. Yancy was on one side and the doula and the nurse were on the other. I had a mirror angled so that I could see everything. I wanted to watch. Well, at least I wanted to watch in the beginning.

My labor had been long. It had already been over 24 hours, but my water still hadn’t broken. And I hadn’t let them break it. I had just started pushing, bearing down with everything I had just like I’d been taught in our birthing classes. I pushed and I pushed and I pushed. Nothing was happening. It was certainly not what I had expected. All the videos we watched and movies I’d ever seen looked so easy. A few hard pushes and out popped a head. Not so with me.

I pushed. And pushed. And pushed some more. Nearly two hours. All of a sudden I saw an opening and a small round pale, white ball. I mean it was white. Nearly transulscent.

Oh my God. I thought. There really was an alien in there. My worst fears were happening when suddenly my doula looked down and said, “oh, I can see your water bag!”

She said it so gleefully. Apparently, your bag of water can come out in front of your baby’s head if it hasn’t broken. I breathed a sigh of relief. Thank God my son was not going to be a mutant.

I kept pushing and the ball kept bulging. It was almost like my vagina was trying to blow a bubble. Then I gave it one HUGE push and my bag of water shot out like a baseball. The nurse between my legs ducked and my bag of water splattered everywhere around her.

We were all silent for a second and than everyone in the room burst out laughing. No one had seen anything like it before. Not the nurses or my doula who had been delivering babies for the last twenty years.  Apparently, I broke my own bag of water and shot it out like a torpedo. I was pretty proud. Those Kegels really work!

What is the moral of this story? My vagina is stronger than your vagina.

Image credit: istockphoto.com

 

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19 Responses to The Day My Water Broke

  1. Melissa says:

    Lol! Where’s the like button, that’s hilariously awesome! You’re fast becoming my favorite blogger , in fact your the only blog I’ve had time to read or comment on this past week… it’s okay to feel special lol.

  2. That is HILARIOUS. Sure beats having them come after your lady bits with the crochet hook. I wish I was kidding about this!

  3. Kat says:

    You just made me laugh. Great start to the morning.

    Have a great day!!

  4. Patty says:

    hahahaha! How come you’ve never told me this story! So funny.

  5. laura says:

    lol that is great to share, when my water broke is a favorite memory of mine.
    My son was breech and we had to have a c-sec. So naturally June 4th when we scheduled the c-sec for the 6th I was laying in bed and heard a tearing noise, I stood up and a huge gush of water. It also happened to be a full moon on my birthday and it rained that night.
    When we get to the hospital the staff did not believe I was in labor because I was hysterically laughing. Then I had to “pee” in a cup, it was all amniotic fluid, the nurse looked shocked, then checked for dilation I was already 4cm. The nurse placed the external fetal monitor and Austin started to hit and kick it to the point it wasn’t even getting his heartbeat.

  6. Rach says:

    Oh my! I’m laughing thinking about that water breaking over the nurse and everywhere! I wish I had awesome birthing stories to share–alas, my births were either traumatic or routine or induced. Oh well. At least I can now say I’ve heard the best birthing story ever. :o)

    • Mommy Psychologist says:

      And I wish they had allowed a video camera in the delivery room. I’d totally sell my video to TMZ.

  7. That’s awesome. Will Gus ever be allowed to play with water balloons? Or are they just painful reminders?!

  8. Barnmaven says:

    Holy CRAP. That’s some vagina you’ve got there, lady. :D

  9. Peg says:

    Hilarious!!

  10. Lisa J says:

    LOL – that is too funny.

    My pregnancy was miserable – hyperemesis (including repeated ER visits for fluids after particularly bad days and using up all of my ultrasounds before he was even three months old because it was too early to find a heartbeat and they had to see it on ultrasound to be sure I hadn’t lost him and the pregnancy hadn’t turned septic) the whole time. When I went into labor it would literally progress a few hours at a time every night, greatly disturbing sleep and keeping me so tired that it would regularly stall. After five days of this I had another checkup with my OB and asked her if it was real labor, because my sister had the wonderful experience of being laughed out of the hospital repeatedly for braxton-hicks contractions. She checked me and I was already five cm., so she volunteered to break my water that afternoon if I wanted to be admitted. I agreed.

    One little tidbit. It just so happened to be my birthday. Well, they had an emergency C-section and didn’t get back to break my water until 7:30 that night. When they broke my water I said, “I have to have this baby at 9:30 because that is when I was born.”

    They patted me on my knee and told me I would be lucky to have him by midnight.

    When contractions came hard and fast every single one would stop my son’s heartbeat, so they had me start pushing at 9cm and did a rather large episiotomy to help him out.

    He was born at 9:38. I was born at 9:32.

    Amusingly, by the time I finished I had completely forgotten it was my birthday. When a friend arrived the next day with a happy birthday balloon and a layette set, I thought they were both for my son!

    LOL

  11. Lisa J says:

    *three months gestation! Yikes!

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The Mommy Psychologist TM