Tonight is a sad night because it’s my mom’s last night here. She goes back to Wisconsin tomorrow. I don’t know about any of you, but I am closer to my mom than I have ever been. She’s one of my best friends.
This wasn’t always the case. In my life before Gus, I would go for weeks at a time without talking to her. It wasn’t like I didn’t love her or was mad at her. We just led very different lives. Not to mention that we kept very different hours. She rises at the crack of dawn which many times coincided with my bedtime. At the end of the day, she was going to bed when I was finally free to talk. It didn’t help that we have lived over 1,000 miles apart for over ten years. And then I had Gus and I couldn’t talk to her enough.
Everything in my life changed after he was born including my relationship with my mom. During the early months, I talked to her multiple times a day. I don’t know how I would have survived that time if it hadn’t been for her. Even now, it feels weird if I don’t talk to her at least once a day.
The only time I ever consider moving back to the Midwest is when she is visiting. It is just so nice to have her near. I love watching how she loves Gus and how he loves her right back. As I watch them playing together I catch myself thinking maybe we could live in the Midwest. Maybe I could live in Minneapolis again. Or Chicago. But then I remember why I left in the first place.
The funniest part is how often we parrot each other in our interactions with Gus. She plays with Gus in the same way I play with Gus. She talks to him just like I talk to him. She uses the same voice I do. There have been numerous times over the last week when we both said the same thing to him at the same time. I realize that everything I know about connecting with my son comes from how she connected with me when I was a little girl.
This is one of my favorite pictures of my mom and Gus. It captures the early days so perfectly. Take note of Gus’s look. He came out of the womb this way.
We will miss you, Grandma!